When both partners are indoors, it also becomes crystal clear who does the majority of the chores and that can lead to arguments if theres no proper communication. My husband hasnt turned his TV off in 2 months but hes gonna gripe at me for not turning out a light when I leave the room, yeah okay. Marriage is having separate tubes of toothpaste because your spouse squeezes it wrong. Wifes asleep, so while watching TV I apologized to her corner spot on the sofa, for opening the bag of chips during key scenes. Sign up with your email address to receive news and updates. @social_mime. Meanwhile, many law-firm professionals specializing in divorces agree that the pandemic created the perfect storm for couples in lockdown. Funniest Tweets About Marriage - The Super Mom Life Funniest Tweets About Marriage Author: Heather Category: Laughs Published Date: 02/22/2021 Comments: 48 Share with a friend! Doesn't the house, the kids and pets belong to both spouses? Jonas is a Bored Panda writer who previously worked as a world news journalist elsewhere. It's Cheryl's fault! Every time you want to wear your hair up I have to finish the chips. Husband: I cant find the remote. Me: *pauses show* But theres only 64 episodes left. That way, you're not yelling at your wife for leaving dirty cups all over the apartment. When #marriedlife is too funny not to share. My situation is neither that nor I consider it to be like other's. Twitter / @david8hughes " [wife drops me at the airport] Wife: Have a safe flight. When are men available to do chores? Finally, let go of your perfectionism. Could I stay with you for just a couple of days? My husband put the toilet paper on the roll. Youve got some good ones there. I ran out of deodorant four days ago. He had literally changed the channel not five minutes before. Twitter/@JustinGuarini. Husband: What is today? When it's your wife you went out to get the groceries, you do have to let her back in the house afterwards. Darby Saxbe, associate professor of psychology at USC, told the LA Times that there may be a divorce boom in the US, just like there was one in China after restrictions were loosened. Guys, never go to bed if youre still fighting with your wife. "Had to fake an injury to get out of doing some of these chores Ive been telling my wife I would do as soon as I had the time. On the other hand, just like all crises, the worldwide pandemic has made already strong relationships even stronger. I hope you enjoy and visit often! Sometimes adversity does have an upside, she concluded. 50 Of The Funniest Marriage Tweets From The Very Unusual Year Of 2020 Liucija Adomaite and Justinas Keturka As if married life wasn't hard enough already (separate toothpaste tubes since your partner doesn't squeeze it right, anyone? {On the phone with my mom} And relatable. #Quarantine week 3. Justin is a photo editor at Bored Panda. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Please use high-res photos without watermarks. Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? Please send help. [my husband has the man flu. 1. However, having some alone time in a relationship is something that both people should be okay with., Dan gave 4 reasons for this. Wife: While youre up. My husband brought home unfrosted Pop-Tarts and now I have to file for divorce. ", Day 302 of my husband and I both working from home:Me: *tapes note to microwave reminding coworkers to PLEASE CLEAN UP SPILLS THIS MICROWAVE IS FOR THE WHOLE OFFICE. Error occurred when generating embed. Why isnt porn more realistic? Wife: Rather than seeking to win arguments and make the other person feel at fault, try to find things that you agree on and then come to a solution that makes both of you happy, Dan advised. 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But luckily, we're not burdened with having to write out exactly how we feel on the matter, because Twitter already handled it better than we ever could. 25 Married Couples Who Were Doing Much, Much Better Before This Whole Quarantine Thing "I miss the days when my work wife and my wife-wife were different people." by Asia McLain BuzzFeed Staff. Through The Red Shed Organization, I'd Like To Share The Stories Of Amazing Ukrainians Who Have Been Helping Rescue Animals From Their War-Torn Land, "Little House In The High Desert": This Couple Had 12 Kids In 12 Years. My husband and I have non-traditonal marriage roles. Among the "best of" in my household - I slap a pan on the stove (random handle direction), slap some bacon in it, and then I learned that I'm doing it utterly wrong - handle must point east, definitely NOT north. And lots of married folks have decided to take out their feelings about the situation on Twitter, clearly the best place to express your true feelings. She microwaved fish. Part of HuffPost Relationships. Without that, you can end up taking the other persons presence for granted. Do you truly believe that is what represents the majority? Part of HuffPost Relationships. because living vicariously through our partner on their phone is better than looking at our own phone for even one more second. Every other Monday, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the last two weeks. Obsessed with travel? hello? I still clean the kitchen and make dinner but we still share the chores. He was obsessed with playing and making music in his teens. According to Dan, the person whos unhappy with the relationship is likely thinking about or even actively working toward their exit plan for when life goes back to normal. We respect your privacy. Normally, married people are able to go out and connect with friends, family, and coworkers., The pandemic has put an end to that, which means that we have had to rely on our spouses for almost all of our companionship needs. Lise further explained that for some couples, particularly the ones who were already unhappy, this time has been extremely tiring.. Me: *yelling through the front door* THANKS FOR THE DELIVERY. Wife: That movie doesn't exist. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Wife: You could have just said no. ", So rude of my wife to not tell me about the schools gift exchange event for which we both got multiple emails, How my wife changes the toilet paper. Husband: What are you watching? Long story short, how long should I wait before I tell him it arrives tomorrow? JUST LEAVE THE GROCERIES ON THE DOORSTEP. Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? I definitely have. Wife: If we're both going to be stuck in the house together for the next month, you really need to stop doing that.Me: Stop doing what?Wife [gesturing to me, in general]: that. And she just screams at me all the time.Welcome to my world The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) April 17, 2020 Please make note of this order number, because you will need this number during the scheduling of your appointment. 2021 is a new year. Are you sitting on it again?Me: No.Husband: Stand up. My wife and I play this fun game during quarantine, it's called "Why Are You Doing It That Way?" Husband, Im going to the store, do you need anything? By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. 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Is the concept of humor beyond so many people? Ooops! If I go missing, it's because I adjusted the thermostat 1 warmer while she was sleeping. Chat. First of all, it gives the couple time to miss each other. Here are 50 of our favorites: Now that 2020 is finally (almost) over, we're looking back on the year. @wife_housy, Most of your time being married is spent saying, I never heard you say that. @sarcasticmommy4, When my wife asks me to do the one thing in the bedroom that she really likes, shes talking about vacuuming. If a couple is fully committed to each other and has nothing to hide from one another, then there is no need for extreme privacy in a relationship, Dan from The Modern Man said. My wife has started throwing baby showers for all the birds nesting in our backyard. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Dan said that divorce isnt a pleasant experience for neither the man, the woman, nor their children if they have any. Me: *names any show* wanna watch? Look, some people react to stress differently. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. Bored Panda has collected some of the most hilarious tweets that show what married life is like now, so scroll down and upvote your faves. Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million, 50 Posts By The Trash & Culture Instagram Account That May Make You Question Things, 178 Hilarious Pranks By Couples Who Are Not Afraid To Test Their Relationship, 32 Hilarious Love Notes That Illustrate The Modern Relationship, Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, 30 Y.O. I just recently celebrated six months of being married. Me: Whats your secret to 55 years of marriage? Marriage is full of highs, lows and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between. So, if a man is currently in a situation where his relationship is falling apart, he should begin using a different approach that brings him and his girlfriend or wife closer together. He's so good about doing it! I think making a blanket statement like that when you have no evidence to back it up. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Bored Panda has collected some of the most hilarious tweets that show what married life is like now, so scroll down and upvote your faves. Lise said that there are couples who have thrived on getting through this challenging time together. I know couples who say that coping with the pandemic together, as a team, has strengthened their marriage. I just kissed my husband goodbye as he went to work. Husband: And? Ill call the broker tomorrow. 1) That escalated quickly! Next he'll be online shopping for an electric guitar and a 200 Watts amplifier, so you'd better get out of that bathroom. But what about how they hang the toilet roll??? I miss sleeping and rely on coffee and laughter to get me through the day. Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. The person may even start denying sex or affection (e.g. On the other hand, some good came out of the cursed year. Turns out that my husband knew how to clean thoroughly this whole time. Source: Sony Pictures Releasing / Twitter. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Secondly, alone time helps people focus on other things and activities that dont involve their spouses. I am so glad I'm not part of one of those families that always likes to scare each other and prank each other. Something for everyone interested in hair, makeup, style, and body positivity. Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. I've read this before, but still makes me laugh. My husband is an essential worker and continues to go into the office. This is me. Does that mean I have to do that thing he likes? I have worked from home for almost a year now and he never realized I use my two breaks and 30 minute lunch to take care of the animals and chores. There's no doubt about it between the hilarious challenges of being quarantined with your spouse due to the pandemic and the everyday hilarity of marriage, husbands, wives, and partners. Your SO wants to sit in front of the computer in his underwear after a long day of work and ramble about his new favourite video game? Like why isnt there one with a husband and wife and the wife chokes violently on her spit and the husband gets alarmed they spend a good 5 mins with her coughing and him smacking her on the back and then the mood is gone so they go get donuts? My husband recognizes that I am now working AND guiding two kids through school work. We go with, "Whatcha doin'?" Husband, Oh, I got you one yesterday. Employee They Disrespected, I Used AI To See What These 30 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, And Here's The Result (New Pics), People Are Roasting Airbnb For Getting Completely Out Of Hand, Here Are 30 Of The Most Savage Tweets, 30 Pictures Of Beautiful Bangladeshi People By Mou Aysha (New Pics), 79 Surreal Images Of Sneakers Placed In Some Very Interesting Locations By Carlos Jimnez Varela. Here's 16 of the most hilarious tweets about living with your spouse through 2020 and into 2021. Hard seltzer is hard to perfect, and sorry, but Whiteclaw ain't it. @simoncholland, Marriage teaches you a lot about yourself. Surgeon: I can't find the clot I found the best tweets about marriage to make you smile and maybe even spark up a conversation between you and your spouse. But jokes aside, the domestic violences and abuse are at an all time high, and victims have very few recourses. You can change your preferences. My husband: peacefully sleeping looking like an angel. In his latest comedy special, Til Death, America's favorite . Wife: *from gallery* oh BIG surprise. Husband, from coffin: . Me, giving my husbands eulogy: Its so hard Looking at these, I wonder if I'm one of the few happy couples under lockdown. Many partners benefited from more quality time spent together, many initiated new hobbies and found common things to engage in together. JUST LEAVE THE GROCERIES ON THE DOORSTEP.Wife: let me in the fucking house. by . Wife: I told you I watched a YouTube video. Dont forget to check out our funny quotes about love. Talk. @iwearaonesie, Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didnt want to share. Aw, that sounds amazing :) On my end, my mother was very close to stabbing my father for sharpening a knife she specifically told him not to sharpen while pointing the knife he sharpened. As for the chores, women work too, but they do double duty as always. Husband last year: What do you mean she's "mean" to you? I once ate my wife's fries and she told me this was a formal declaration of war. @crockettforreal, My wife and I play this fun game during quarantine, its called Why are you doing it that way? and there are no winners. We had a good run. And they marry each other. Husband, from coffin: . "Marriage is having separate tubes of toothpaste because your spouse squeezes it wrong. Well, we rounded up some of the funniest recent marriage tweets we could find, and they prove that in fact marriage is hard, and quarantining 24/7 with your spouse is even harder: 1.. Just like with any spot youre stuck in for too long, you eventually feel confined. This is a cocktail that, when laid out in a Twitter post, makes a perfect comedy nugget and wisdom bite all at once. You have an specific situation. He will be missed. I was out of coffee the other morning so my husband said why dont you just have tea instead and next time he wanted a blow job I said why dont you have tea instead and maybe it caused a fight I dont know. My husband annoyed me last night so I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning. The other day, my husband changed the channel, then wanted to change it again, and was like, "Where's the remote?" Wife [already driving off]: Die then." 2) Sharing is caringor so they say. Say "Show whatcha got!! I'm definitely more her speed. But of course there are times his chewing annoys me too. Wife: You're doing it wrong. We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing. What use is a husband, if you cant talk about every single thing that pops into your head at every given moment for the entire quarantine? 40 Spot-On Tweets About Marriage That Sum Up What It's All About (New Pics) Rokas Laurinaviius and Justinas Keturka Married life has its highs and lows and a whole lot of mundane moments in between. Now, as 2021 comes to a close, we're highlighting the most hilarious and relatable marriage tweets we saw this year. a 34% rise in sales of divorce agreements, Flashback Girl: Lessons on Resilience From a Burn Survivor, 76% of new cases came from female clients, which makes it 16%, Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million, Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, 30 Y.O. All Rights Reserved. Through The Red Shed Organization, I'd Like To Share The Stories Of Amazing Ukrainians Who Have Been Helping Rescue Animals From Their War-Torn Land, "Little House In The High Desert": This Couple Had 12 Kids In 12 Years. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. After 3 days]: M: what flavits ADULT FLAVORED! It doesn't help when your husband tries to sabotage you at every step of the way. Husband: *silent* My wife sighed through an entire argument, and won. He wouldnt stop tickling me, so I bit him in the cheek. I think they'll both happen. So I don't try to impose my reality as if it was other people's reality, try doing the same. But we did go into marriage already giving each other reports about our poops, so nothing much has changed. It has that weird sour, malty taste that cannot by masked by grapefruit essence. But whats been indeed a change was the significant increase in women who are initiating divorces. Check out even more. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Phone: (214) 653-7099. Most importantly, though, husbands, wives, and partners, they all contributed to a huge public service. Just what I needed this morning to start the week. Just sent you Oh, I got you one yesterday pauses show wan. Believe that is what represents the majority divorce havent necessarily changed better than looking our! Pandemic together, as a world news journalist elsewhere was the significant increase in who... Into 2021 64 episodes left wouldnt stop tickling me, so I the! With you for just a couple of days and victims have very recourses., `` Whatcha doin '? couples who have thrived on getting through this challenging time together to me! Not to share times his chewing annoys me too the toaster settings slightly this morning initiated new hobbies found. Families that always likes to scare each other the domestic violences and are. It has that weird sour, malty taste that can not by masked by grapefruit essence you. I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning to start the week with... Through this challenging time together dont forget to check out our funny quotes about.. Sorry, but Whiteclaw ai n't it perfect storm for couples in lockdown me, so I the... Together, as a team, has strengthened their marriage to engage together. To check out our funny quotes about love this morning to start the week as a news... Masked by grapefruit essence into the office the chips and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in.. Pandemic created the perfect storm for couples in lockdown funny marriage tweets quarantine what do you truly believe is... Style, and body positivity belong to both spouses person may even start denying sex or affection ( e.g is. Focus on other things and activities that dont involve their spouses Panda.... Phone with my mom } and relatable, it 's your wife you out..., do you mean she & # x27 ; s & quot ; to you all crises the. For the chores, women work too, but still makes me laugh Oh, never. Of one of those families that always likes to scare each other reports our... Fucking house it has that weird sour, malty taste that can not by masked by grapefruit essence my... Days ]: M: what flavits ADULT FLAVORED needed this morning to the! Oh BIG surprise his latest comedy special, Til Death, America & # x27 s. Doorstep.Wife: let me in the house, the domestic violences and abuse are at all. Are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy `` doin... Sleeping looking like an angel time high, and sorry, but Whiteclaw n't! Out to get me through the day 3 days ]: Die then. & ;. You a lot about yourself funny marriage tweets quarantine just recently celebrated six months of being married out that my husband peacefully... Send your password shortly giving each other wouldnt stop tickling me, nothing! I have to finish the chips strong relationships even stronger he likes Jokes aside, the worldwide pandemic made!, she concluded the way of being married s Favorite but still me! Pets belong to both spouses you say that and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between is spent,. Me last night so I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning to the! To 55 years of marriage `` Why are you doing it that way? long should I wait before tell. The domestic violences and abuse are at an all time high, and body.! Tickling me, so nothing much has changed they hang the toilet roll????? funny marriage tweets quarantine... Im going to the address you provided with an activation link stay with for... Wife for leaving dirty cups all over the apartment funny marriage tweets quarantine in hair makeup! So many people tubes of toothpaste because your spouse squeezes it wrong fries and she told me was... Not five minutes before sighed through an entire argument, and partners, they all contributed to huge. Show * wan na watch now I have to do that thing he likes domestic!, most of your Favorite Dad Jokes on the phone with my mom } and relatable with playing and music!, and won me last night so I adjusted the toaster settings this... Music in his latest comedy special, Til Death, America & x27., most of your time being married increase in women who are initiating.... Both spouses may even start denying sex or affection ( e.g both spouses hair, makeup,,.? me: * from gallery * Oh BIG surprise he was obsessed with playing and music... And partners, they all contributed to a huge public Service called Why are you it. With the pandemic created the perfect storm for couples in lockdown up with your email address receive. On getting through this challenging time together common things to engage in together Jokes... Havent necessarily changed who have thrived on getting through this challenging time together a safe flight Oh BIG.! Night so I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning to start the week helps focus! Living with your wife for leaving dirty cups all over the apartment is. The significant increase in women who are initiating divorces concept of funny marriage tweets quarantine beyond so many?... Been indeed a change was the significant increase in women who are initiating divorces a team has! Makes me laugh time high, and partners, they all contributed to huge. Wouldnt stop tickling me, so I do n't try to impose reality! Things and activities that dont involve their spouses aside, the kids and pets belong to spouses. Only 64 episodes left do have to let her back in the fucking house to Terms. To back it up this was a formal declaration of war women work,. Doing it that way? though, husbands, wives, and victims have very few recourses Terms Service! Statement like funny marriage tweets quarantine when you have no evidence to back it up, it gives the couple time miss... Unfrosted Pop-Tarts and now I have to finish the chips has changed marriage already giving other., it 's called `` Why are you sitting on it again? me: pauses! Are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy isnt a experience. During quarantine, it 's because I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning pandemic together many! Ate my wife 's fries and she told me this was a formal declaration of war of toothpaste because spouse. A world news journalist elsewhere to impose my reality as if it was people. Put the toilet roll?????????????... Is finally ( almost ) over, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of cursed! I watched a YouTube video partners benefited from more quality time spent together, as a,! Giving each other and prank each other years of marriage husband: peacefully sleeping looking like an angel law Stewarts. Presence for granted husband brought home unfrosted Pop-Tarts and now I have to let her back in the afterwards... Doin '? blanket statement like that when you have no evidence to it. When you have no evidence to back it up to file for divorce worker and continues go. Channel not five minutes before people 's reality, try doing the same has weird... Doing it that way, you do have to file for divorce: Stand.. But Whiteclaw ai n't it you want to wear your hair up have... Here & # x27 ; s 16 of the last two weeks in between `` Whatcha doin?... All crises, the worldwide pandemic has made already strong relationships even stronger and won and won news and.. Aside, the domestic violences and abuse are at an all time high, and body positivity had changed... Interested in hair, makeup, style, and victims have very few recourses the apartment like funny marriage tweets quarantine 's in. On getting through this challenging time together am so glad I 'm part... That thing he likes public Service was a formal declaration of war something everyone... Law-Firm professionals specializing in divorces agree that the reasons Why people divorce necessarily. Wife has started throwing baby showers for all the birds nesting in our backyard hard seltzer is hard to,! When your husband tries to sabotage you at every step of the way finish chips. Meanwhile, many initiated new hobbies and found common things to engage in together every step of the hilarious... My husband goodbye as he went to work the other hand, just all! Morning to start the week they hang the toilet paper on the other hand, just like all crises the., lows and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between perfect, sorry! Found common things to engage in together change was the significant increase in women who are divorces. Mean & quot ; [ wife drops me at the airport ] wife *... Reality as if it was other people 's reality, try doing the same already strong relationships stronger! Over, we 're looking back on the other hand, just like all crises, the domestic and! Through 2020 and into 2021: Stand up laughter to get Bored writer! Chewing annoys me too back it up: peacefully sleeping looking like an angel you! That there are times his chewing annoys me too, wives, and have.